New Beginnings: 5 Resolutions for the New Year

December 31, 2016
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The new year is often a time of making vague resolutions. But few of us turn those vague resolutions into specific action plans.


As you think about finding the right person to date, beginning a new relationship or improving a current relationship, keep these specific tangible resolution actions in mind:


1 - Be the person you want for a partner

Think about all the characteristics you want in a partner – loving, kind, funny, thoughtful, generous, fun, etc. Now try to be all those things. If you become more loving and kind and funny and thoughtful and generous and fun, you will like yourself more. You’ll respect yourself more. You’ll be more comfortable and confident. The more you love yourself, the more likely you’ll be to form strong, healthy relationships with others.

Leave the baggage behind


Often, when we look back, we see only the mistakes we have made. It’s healthy to correct and learn from mistakes, but dwelling on those mistakes or carrying the weight of them with us can cause us to get stuck in negative patterns of behavior. Lugging emotional baggage into a new relationship can sabotage your chances for a healthy, happy relationship. Own mistakes, apologize for them, learn from them and move on. Resolve to have a clean slate, not allowing past mistakes to rule your future.


2 - Find a hobby

And, though we’d like to convince ourselves otherwise, watching Netflix doesn’t count as a hobby. Take a painting class or an exercise class. Go hiking. Learn a new language. Refinish furniture or take up photography. The most interesting people never stop learning and growing. Invest in yourself. You’re worth it!


3 - Give up the hook up

If you’re serious about wanting a healthy, stable relationship, you know the hook up isn’t going to help achieve that goal. One-night stands put you at greater risk for STDs and unexpected pregnancies. And hook ups based only on physical attraction don’t send the message that you’re looking for a real relationship.


4 - Maintain friendships

It’s easy to get so caught up in a dating relationship that we ditch our friends. Even if he’s the one, you still need strong friendships. So make time to nurture and maintain friendships. Having friends is good for your physical health. A study of 222 people in 2015 found that people with smaller social circles are at greater risk for early mortality (death) than even people who drink excessively or suffer from obesity. And having friends is good for your mental health. Friends boost your happiness and reduce your stress. Strong friendships help boost your confidence and increase your sense of belonging and purpose. So don’t get so caught up in a dating relationship that you neglect your friendships. Your life and health depend on it.

By turning those large, vague resolutions into tangible action plans, you may start to see actual changes this year!

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Seeing another positive pregnancy test after having had a past abortion may bring up memories or emotions from that experience. If you already know you don’t want another abortion, you may be wondering what other choices you have and whether either feels realistic for your life right now. You have time to learn about your options and the available support. Collage is here to give you a place to discuss your circumstances so you can decide what’s right for you. Schedule a no-cost appointment today to learn more about your pregnancy and what your next steps could look like. And read on to learn more about your pregnancy options besides abortion. Consider What Parenting Would Require You may want to parent but have concerns about whether you can make it work. Finances, housing, childcare, your relationship, work, or school can all influence how possible this option feels right now. Before deciding that those challenges make parenting unrealistic, it can help to identify your biggest concerns individually. Some of those concerns may have solutions you haven’t considered yet. Think about the support you already have, along with what you would need during pregnancy and after your baby arrives. Knowing where the gaps are can make it easier to find resources rather than trying to solve everything at once. Learn More About Adoption If you don’t want another abortion but aren’t ready to parent, adoption is another option. Today, a woman making an adoption plan can have a significant role in deciding what that plan looks like. Depending on the type of adoption, you may be able to choose an adoptive family and decide what level of contact you would like after placement. Open, semi-open, and closed adoption offer different levels of communication and privacy. Speaking with a licensed adoption professional can help you understand these differences, your rights, and what the process would involve before you make any commitments. Discuss Your Options in a Confidential Space Having had an abortion before does not mean you have to make the same pregnancy decision again. Your feelings, circumstances, priorities, or perspective may be different this time. If you know you don’t want another abortion, start by learning what parenting and adoption could realistically look like in your current situation. Collage provides a place to talk about your pregnancy and the concerns influencing your decision. We can also connect you with adoption agencies and community organizations that provide the support you’re seeking. Reaching out doesn’t lock you into a specific decision. Schedule a no-cost appointment with Collage today to get your questions answered and explore the options available to you. Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services.
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