What Do I Need To Know About My Pregnant Wife?
So the pregnancy test is positive; you’re going to be a dad! Now that the initial shock or excitement (or both) has calmed, you might be wondering what in the world you should know about your pregnant wife.
Obviously we can’t fit everything you need to know about pregnancy into one blog post. But here are 7 things you need to know about your pregnant wife.
1. She’s hungry. Seriously, the stereotypes exist for a reason. She’s growing an entire human being inside her. That takes a lot of sustenance! She’s hungry. Of course, she may only be really hungry for certain things — pregnancy cravings are actually a thing. If you want to be the hero-husband, give her the food she’s hungry for. Even if that means driving around town in search of the right queso or the best chocolate milkshake or the exact ingredients she wants in her salad.
2. She’s tired. Growing a person and a placenta is exhausting. Your wife is probably tired in a way she’s never experienced before. If you’re understanding of that exhaustion and do what you can to help her rest, she will be so grateful.
3. She’s hormonal. The hormones are real. And it takes a lot of them to grow a baby! All that to say, your wife will probably be much more moody than usual. Rest assured – she doesn’t like the mood swings any more than you do. When she feels like she won an Olympic gold medal one minute and like she just missed the final shot in the NBA finals the next, she doesn’t understand it either. Pregnancy hormones are not to be understood; they are to be survived. She probably needs you to be very patient with her as you both endure the hormones.
4. She’s uncomfortable. Her body is morphing and growing in ways she’s never experienced. Her rib cage and hip bones are expanding and moving to make room for another person inside her. As the baby grows, she feels like her bladder is becoming a tiny trampoline. Getting comfortable in bed becomes more and more challenging (thus all the pillows!). She needs you to be empathetic.
5. She’s worried you aren’t attracted to her. As we just said, her body is changing and growing. She’s gaining weight (probably in places other than her tummy); she may be growing hair in unusual places; she may have a dark line down her abdomen or stretch marks on her sides; she might have varicose veins in her legs; her ankles might be swollen. There’s a chance she isn’t feeling her most attractive right now. So she needs to know you think she’s beautiful. Tell her. Often.
6. She’s scared. Oh, there are so many things to be afraid of when you’re expecting a baby! What are pregnant women afraid of? Maybe that she won’t be a good mother or that she won’t know what to do. Maybe she’s scared of labor and how much it will hurt. Maybe that something will go wrong with the baby. Maybe that something will happen to you and she will have to do this all on her own. Maybe she’s afraid about financial pressures. Maybe she’s scared her relationship with you will change. Like we said, there are so many things to fear when you’re having a baby. You’re probably afraid of some of those same things. Maybe you can talk about those things and reassure each other and face those scary things together.
7. She needs you. You might sometimes feel a little left out or unnecessary because she is the one who gets to carry your child and give birth. But please know – your wife needs you. She probably feels vulnerable and raw and tired and scared, and she needs you to be her partner. Things are always better when we know we aren’t facing life alone. She needs your help making decisions and offering emotional support. She needs your affirmation and reassurance. Even though she’s the one carrying the baby, you are vital!
Although having a baby is a huge deal and can be completely overwhelming, this is such a special time in your lives. Pregnancy and parenting can help you and your wife draw closer together and become even more of a team than you imagined. If you don’t know how your wife is feeling or what she needs from you, ask her! Without a doubt, she’ll appreciate you even more as she sees how much you care.