Why Your Brain is Your Largest Sex Organ

October 12, 2015
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Sex and Your Brain

Often when we talk about the risks of sex, we focus on the physical risks such as pregnancy and STDs (sexually transmitted diseases). Other times we talk about the emotional risks involved with sex, but we rarely discuss the psychological consequences, or how sex affects your brain. Advances in neuroscience have made it possible to study how the brain is active and even how it is altered by sexual activity.


Why Your Brain is Your Largest Sex Organ?

During sex there are three prominent neurochemicals that are involved and each has a significant affect on your brain.


Dopamine: This chemical is present in men and women. Dopamine is a “reward chemical” in that it rewards people by saturating their brain with a feeling of exhilaration when that persons engages in the activity (in this case sex). Unfortunately, dopamine doesn’t know the difference between positive and negative behaviors and so it rewards the brain for both types of actions, things such as acing a test or speeding. Dopamine is the chemical that is responsible for the addictive nature of sex. It keeps you wanting that next fix.


Oxytocin: This is found in the female and is the bonding chemical. When this is released, it increases her desire for touch and causes her to bond to the person she is in physical contact with. With intercourse and orgasm, oxytocin washes over the brain, causing her to want more sex with the person she is bonded with. Like dopamine, oxytocin doesn’t discriminate. The result can be that a woman becomes bonded with someone she only thought would be a casual hookup.


Vasopressin: This is the male version of the bonding chemical and is the cause of the man’s connection with the woman. Again, it is non-discriminatory and may result in an unintentional connection with a partner.


“Sex Brain” and Bad Decisions

Understanding how these chemicals work can explain why people make bad decisions and helps us better understand the consequences. Often people jump into sex too soon. One reason for this is sex rewires the brain to make it easier to say yes to more sex. The part of the brain that regulates sexual restraint is weakened. They crave the release of dopamine. This helps explain why after a breakup, once a new relationship has begun it can progress quickly to a sexual relationship.


Another affect is that sex can keep people in bad relationships. Most of us know couples that stay in unhealthy, even abusive relationships and find ourselves asking why. It’s the sex. The bonding chemicals create such a strong attachment, even if there is no other foundation for the relationship that they can’t leave each other.


A third affect is that when a person engages in patterns of dating, having sex, breaking up finding a new partner, or just casually hooking up, that person potentially makes it more difficult to later bond with a spouse. By disrupting the function of the bonding chemicals, this pattern can break the circuits needed for long-term commitment. It becomes addicted to the sex without the emotional connection.


These affects can last a long time, affecting the person’s ability to emotionally invest and be committed to future relationships.


Safe Sex is about more than wearing a condom. It’s about protecting yourself physically, emotionally and psychologically. It’s about understanding the risks in all three areas and taking the steps to keep yourself safe. After all, you’re worth it! If you are struggling with the physical, emotional or psychological affects of sexual activity and would like to talk to someone, our team is available.


If you are interested in reading more about the psychological affects of sex on the brain, we encourage you to check out “Hooked” by Joe S. McIlhaney Jr, MD and Freda McKissic Bush, MD.

February 10, 2026
An unexpected pregnancy can already feel like a lot to carry. However, when your partner is strongly pushing you toward abortion, and you’re not sure what you want, it can feel even heavier. You may feel torn between your own emotions and his expectations, trying to keep the peace while feeling anxious or confused. If you’re in this situation, take a deep breath. At Collage, we understand how emotionally complicated this can be. You deserve a safe place to talk through what you’re feeling and be treated with respect. You don’t have to rush into a decision. Schedule a free appointment to learn how we can help you navigate this situation. It’s Your Decision Sometimes a partner’s reaction is rooted in panic. He may be thinking about finances, school, your relationship, or how unprepared he feels. In his mind, abortion may seem like the fastest solution. When someone repeatedly insists on one outcome, refuses to listen, or makes you feel guilty for even considering other options, it can start to feel like your voice doesn’t matter. And in a moment this vulnerable, your voice matters more than ever.  Giving Yourself Space If conversations feel tense or emotionally draining, it’s okay to take a step back. You have the right to say something like, “I need time to think. I’m not ready to decide right now.” Creating a little space can help you reconnect with your own thoughts instead of constantly reacting to his. Sometimes the best thing you can do is pause, breathe, and remind yourself that you don’t have to figure everything out in one day. You Deserve Respect It’s also important to pay attention to warning signs. If your partner threatens to leave, withdraw support, manipulate you emotionally, or isolate you from others unless you choose abortion, that is not love. That is control. You deserve a relationship where your safety and well-being are protected, not threatened. If you ever feel unsafe, reach out for immediate support. The National Domestic Violence Hotline (800-799-7233) offers 24/7 confidential resources to help you get the assistance you need. You Deserve a Safe Place to Talk It Through At Collage, we’re here to support you. You don’t have to walk into our center with a decision already made. You can come in simply because you need someone to listen, help you process, and remind you that you are not alone. This is your pregnancy and future. If your partner is pressuring you and you’re feeling unsure, please know that help is available. We offer a calm, caring environment where you can talk openly, ask questions, and explore your options without feeling judged or persuaded to make a specific decision. You are not alone in this. Schedule an appointment with Collage today. We’re here to walk with you, one step at a time. Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services .
January 23, 2026
Facing an unplanned pregnancy can bring up difficult questions, especially when it comes to your relationship. You may be wondering whether you are required to tell your partner you’re considering an abortion, or whether it’s okay to keep that information private. Fear of conflict, concern about pressure, or a desire to protect your emotional well-being can all play a role. These feelings are common, and it’s okay to take time to think through what feels safest and healthiest for you. Collage offers a confidential and non-judgmental space where you can discuss these concerns without pressure. Before making any decisions, we provide cost-free pregnancy services , including ultrasounds, to help you understand important details about your pregnancy. Our goal is to give you accurate medical information and the space you need to move forward with clarity. You’re welcome to schedule a private, confidential appointment to learn more when you feel ready. Understanding Your Autonomy In many states, adults are not legally required to tell a partner if they’re considering or planning an abortion. Medical decisions about your body are generally protected by privacy laws, meaning the decision is legally yours. Some exceptions exist, such as parental involvement laws for minors, but partner notification is typically not required for adults. Even when the law is clear, the emotional side of this decision can feel complicated. You may feel torn between maintaining privacy and wanting honesty in your relationship. There is no single “right” approach, only what best supports your well-being and circumstances. When Safety Is a Concern In some relationships, sharing your thoughts with a partner may lead to understanding or emotional support. In others, it may not feel safe. If you’re worried about pressure, manipulation, anger, or physical harm, prioritizing your safety is essential. You’re never obligated to share information that could put you at risk. If you feel unsafe or unsure, confidential help is available through the National Domestic Violence Hotline (800-799-SAFE). Support is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Why Medical Information Matters Whether or not you involve your partner, having accurate medical information is an important step. An ultrasound can help confirm gestational age, pregnancy location, and whether the pregnancy is viable. These details matter for your health and can help you feel more grounded as you consider your next steps. You Are Not Alone At Collage, we offer a confidential, respectful environment where your voice and concerns are taken seriously. Our team provides pregnancy confirmation, emotional support, and space to think through your situation without pressure or judgment. You deserve time, clarity, and peace of mind as you decide what is right for your life. Connect with Collage to discuss your questions in a supportive and confidential setting. Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services.
December 17, 2025
Holiday gatherings often bring familiar traditions, questions, and expectations. But when you’re carrying the news of an unexpected pregnancy that you haven’t shared, the season may feel different this year. You might be participating in celebrations while quietly navigating thoughts and emotions that others cannot see. If you want clarity about your pregnancy or a private space to consider your next steps, Collage offers free services, including pregnancy tests, ultrasounds, and confidential consultations, to support your needs. Schedule your appointment today. Prepare Yourself, Not the Perfect Conversation You may not be ready to share your news, and that’s okay. What can help is preparing yourself: deciding on the topics you’re comfortable discussing, the questions you want to avoid, and the boundaries you want to set. This proactivity allows you to answer without feeling like you need to tell all and not overshare. Create Space Throughout the Gathering Instead of thinking about the whole event at once, break it into smaller, manageable moments. Emotional regulation becomes easier when you give yourself space to reset. Try:  Stepping outside for a few breaths of fresh air Finding a quiet room for a brief pause Taking a short walk after a meal Giving yourself permission to excuse yourself from overwhelming conversations These small steps can help protect your peace. Remember that if at any point during the gathering you’re ready to go home, go ahead. Take care of yourself by calling it a day when necessary. Meet Your Basic Needs Early pregnancy symptoms such as nausea and fatigue can be uncomfortable during gatherings. Come prepared to meet your own needs by bringing pregnancy nausea candy, snacks to settle your stomach, and a water bottle. Store these items in your purse, knowing they’re ready when you need them. You Don’t Have to Navigate This Season Alone If you want clarity before facing holiday conversations, Collage can help you understand your pregnancy and answer questions in a calm, confidential setting, which can make these boundaries easier to hold. Contact us whenever you’re ready to schedule a free appointment. Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services .
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