Am I Ready To Get Married?

August 4, 2018
Paint Texture Border

We’ve heard the sing-song rhyme nearly all our lives. First comes love. Then comes marriage. And when we were five and skipping rope to the rhyme or dressing Barbie up in a white dress to walk down the aisle to marry Ken, it all seemed so simple. You meet someone, fall in love, and get married. Easy peasy. Of course, real life isn’t ever that simple!


The decision to get married is a huge one! Maybe you’ve been dating your partner for a while and you’re wondering if it’s time to take the leap and get married. Maybe you’re wondering the age-old questions, “How do you know when you’ve found The One?” or “How do you know when you’re ready for marriage?”


We don’t pretend to have all the answers. Ultimately, you’re the only one who knows when you’re ready. But there are a few signs you can look for that might help you know if you’re ready to walk down the aisle.


You aren’t looking for your other half. A healthy marriage is made of two complete people who love themselves. If you’re looking for someone else to complete you, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment and your partner up for frustration. Because that’s too much pressure to put on another person. Nobody else can complete you. And you can’t complete someone else. Your marriage is more likely to get off on the right foot if you love yourself and feel like a whole person with your own network of friends and family to support you.


You know what you’re looking for in a partner – and you’ve found it! What traits do you think are important in a partner? What values do you think your spouse should share with you? Before you get married, consider these questions and see if your boyfriend or girlfriend has the traits and values that are important to you.


You really know each other. You’re vulnerable with each other about your insecurities and mistakes, and you still love each other. When you know the hard stuff about each other and you both stick around, that’s a good sign that you’re committed to each other – you know, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health.


When you think about the future, your partner is part of it. When you daydream about 10 years from now or 20 years from now, is your boyfriend or girlfriend part of those daydreams? Have you talked about whether you both want children? Or where you want to live? Or the kind of life you want to live? If you’re on the same page about all the major decisions and you can easily see yourself together for the long haul, then maybe you’ve found the one.


You trust each other and feel secure together. You don’t have doubts about how your partner feels about you. Neither of you threatens to leave when conflict comes up. When you spend time apart, neither of you worries about whether the other is being faithful. A strong marriage is built on trust and security, so having that is a good start to knowing you’re ready for marriage.


You’re ready to make the effort to keep the spark alive. You’ve probably heard older people talk about how much work marriage is. All the spark or chemistry or lovey-dovey feelings you have when a relationship is just starting out won’t consistently be there on a day-to-day basis. Feelings fluctuate. Moods shift. Daily life happens. And sometimes a relationship requires hard work. Are you ready to do the work? Because a healthy marriage requires intentional work on your relationship.


You’re motivated by love and commitment. Not by an agenda or a timeline. You don’t see all your friends getting married and think, “Well, it’s time for me to get married too.” You aren’t graduating from college or turning 25 or turning 30 and thinking that marriage is The Next Step. You’re not feeling pressured to get married because you’re pregnant or because you’ve had sex or because he’s the first guy who’s told you he loves you. It’s a good idea to think about why you want to get married. If your strongest reasons are anything except a genuine love and commitment to your partner, then maybe take a step back and give the relationship more time to grow before you consider marriage.


Who to marry and when to get married — those are some big decisions. Good for you for giving careful thought to whether or not you’re ready! As we said, we don’t pretend to have all the answers, but we’re here to help you ask the hard questions so you can figure out the answers that are best for you. If you want to talk to one of our staff members, please call today.

December 17, 2025
Holiday gatherings often bring familiar traditions, questions, and expectations. But when you’re carrying the news of an unexpected pregnancy that you haven’t shared, the season may feel different this year. You might be participating in celebrations while quietly navigating thoughts and emotions that others cannot see. If you want clarity about your pregnancy or a private space to consider your next steps, Collage offers free services, including pregnancy tests, ultrasounds, and confidential consultations, to support your needs. Schedule your appointment today. Prepare Yourself, Not the Perfect Conversation You may not be ready to share your news, and that’s okay. What can help is preparing yourself: deciding on the topics you’re comfortable discussing, the questions you want to avoid, and the boundaries you want to set. This proactivity allows you to answer without feeling like you need to tell all and not overshare. Create Space Throughout the Gathering Instead of thinking about the whole event at once, break it into smaller, manageable moments. Emotional regulation becomes easier when you give yourself space to reset. Try:  Stepping outside for a few breaths of fresh air Finding a quiet room for a brief pause Taking a short walk after a meal Giving yourself permission to excuse yourself from overwhelming conversations These small steps can help protect your peace. Remember that if at any point during the gathering you’re ready to go home, go ahead. Take care of yourself by calling it a day when necessary. Meet Your Basic Needs Early pregnancy symptoms such as nausea and fatigue can be uncomfortable during gatherings. Come prepared to meet your own needs by bringing pregnancy nausea candy, snacks to settle your stomach, and a water bottle. Store these items in your purse, knowing they’re ready when you need them. You Don’t Have to Navigate This Season Alone If you want clarity before facing holiday conversations, Collage can help you understand your pregnancy and answer questions in a calm, confidential setting, which can make these boundaries easier to hold. Contact us whenever you’re ready to schedule a free appointment. Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services .
November 11, 2025
Learning you’re unexpectedly pregnant can bring up complicated emotions, uncertainty, fear, or even exhaustion if you’ve faced this situation before. You may know that you don’t want another abortion, but still wonder what options exist for your future. At Collage, we provide free and confidential support so you can explore your choices in a compassionate environment. Whether you want to understand what parenting or adoption could look like or simply need someone to listen, you’re not alone. Schedule a free appointment today to learn how we can help. Exploring Parenting Parenting can feel like an enormous responsibility, especially if your finances, relationships, or housing situation are uncertain. Many women ask themselves: “Can I really do this on my own?” “Where will I find the help I need?” “What kind of future can I provide for my child?” These are real and valid questions. At Collage, we’ll help you identify the resources and support available in your community. From offering a warm, supportive presence as you explore this option to providing referrals for resources like housing or childcare support, we’ll ensure you’re not facing these challenges alone. Parenting can be both demanding and deeply rewarding. With encouragement, community connections, and the right information, you can feel more confident in providing a stable, nurturing environment for your child. Understanding Adoption If parenting doesn’t feel like the right fit for your current situation, adoption offers another path forward, one rooted in hope and love. You remain in control of the process, deciding how involved you wish to be in your child’s life. You can select from multiple adoption plans depending on your comfort level: Open adoption: Allows for ongoing communication and contact between you, your child, and the adoptive family. Semi-open adoption: Offers limited contact through a third party, maintaining privacy while keeping some connection. Closed adoption: Protects complete confidentiality with no exchange of identifying information. Financial support is available throughout the adoption process. You’ll never pay for legal or medical services related to adoption. Best of all, adoption agencies can help ensure your needs are met and your wishes are respected every step of the way. Adoption is not an easy decision, but for some women, it brings a sense of peace and purpose, knowing their child is loved and cared for in a stable environment. We can discuss this option with you and offer referrals to reputable agencies so you feel informed. Taking the Next Step Your situation is unique, and so is your decision. Whether you’re considering parenting or adoption or simply need time to process your feelings, Collage is here to provide information and encouragement. We’re available to answer questions, explain your options, and connect you with trusted community resources, all at no cost and in a confidential setting. Schedule your free appointment today to start finding clarity and peace of mind. FAQ: Is it normal to feel uncertain about my decision? Yes. Many women experience mixed emotions when facing an unexpected pregnancy. It’s okay to take time and talk through your options before deciding. What if I don’t think I can afford to parent? We can connect you with programs and community partners that provide material and emotional support, so you will feel more equipped to parent if you choose to. How does adoption work? You remain in control. You’ll choose the family and the level of contact and receive guidance from trusted professionals who handle the legal and practical aspects of the process. Are services at Collage really free? Yes. All services are completely free and confidential. Your privacy and comfort are our priority. Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services.
By Kirsten Berns October 28, 2025
Finding out your partner is unexpectedly pregnant can change everything in an instant. You may feel shocked, worried, or unsure about your role. Those feelings are normal. What matters most is how you respond in this moment and what steps you take next. At Collage, we provide no-cost and confidential services for women and men walking through unexpected pregnancies. Schedule an appointment to learn how we can support you—you don’t have to carry the weight of this situation alone. Understanding Your Own Feelings Before you can support your partner, it’s important to process what you’re experiencing. Talking with a trusted friend, family member, or mentor can help you sort through your emotions and understand what this news means. Showing your partner that you are engaging with your own feelings demonstrates that you are taking the pregnancy seriously. Walking With Her Your partner may be feeling the same uncertainty and fear that you are. One of the most powerful things you can do is simply be present. Attend appointments with her, listen when she shares her concerns, and offer support, like running errands or helping with everyday tasks. These small actions communicate that she is not facing this alone. Learning Together Getting informed is one of the best steps you can take together. At Collage, we provide option information so you and your partner can learn more about parenting, adoption, and abortion. Our staff will answer questions and help you understand what each option may look like. Having reliable, unbiased information allows you to approach this decision more confidently. Taking the Next Step This is not something you have to figure out overnight. Unexpected pregnancies can feel overwhelming, but there are resources, support, and people who care about both of you. Collage is here to listen, guide, and provide clarity when you need it most. Request your no-cost and confidential appointment today. Moving forward together can make all the difference. FAQ: What role should I play if my partner is pregnant? Listening, staying present, and supporting her as she makes decisions is crucial. You don’t have to have every answer, but being by her side matters. Can I attend appointments with her? Yes, and many women appreciate having their partner there. It shows support and can help both of you learn about options together. What if my partner chooses parenting and I don’t feel ready to be a dad? It’s normal to feel unprepared. Talking through your concerns with someone you trust and learning about options can help you move forward with more clarity.  Does Collage provide abortions? Collage does not provide or refer for abortions. However, we do provide no-cost pre-abortion screenings, confidential services, accurate information, and compassionate support so you and your partner can make informed decisions.
Show More