My Boyfriend Cheated On Me

It can be devastating to find out your boyfriend cheated on you. If this has happened to you, you’re probably having all the feelings — shock, disbelief, anger, sadness, grief, fear. All of that is perfectly normal.

You might feel completely lost, wondering what to do now. Do you stay? Do you leave him? Is he really sorry? Can you even trust your own judgment now?

Or maybe you’re just really, really angry. Or really, really sad. And you don’t know where to go from here.

We don’t have all the answers, and we won’t pretend we do. But we do care about you, and we want you to know you don’t have to handle this hard thing alone. So we’ve made a list of some do’s and don’ts that you might find helpful.

Do grieve.
Cry, scream, eat some ice cream, punch a punching bag – do whatever it is you do when you’re really sad. Someone violated your trust, and that’s definitely something worth grieving. Allow yourself time to feel all the yucky emotions you’re feeling.

Don’t plot revenge.
When you first find out and you’re feeling the hot rage of it all, you might be tempted to do something to get back at him. You might want to spread horrible rumors about him. You might even be tempted to try to hurt him by doing something that really hurts you, like hooking up with his friend. Or maybe you want to vandalize his truck, like in that Carrie Underwood song. Trust us, you really want to resist all of these vengeful urges. In the end, you’ll only hurt yourself more. Even though revenge might feel sweet in the now, you’re better than that.

Do try to figure out why.
If he wants to talk with you, give him a chance to explain why he cheated. We’re not saying his behavior can be excused. It can’t. But understanding why may give you some peace of mind and might help you in the future.

But don’t blame yourself.
He might try to excuse his choices by casting some blame on you. Or maybe you’re tempted to blame yourself, believing you somehow drove him to cheat. Please believe us — you are not at fault. Though problems in relationships are nearly always caused by both people, the cheater is always the only one responsible for the infidelity, the cheating.

Do evaluate your options & take time to make a decision.
Maybe you know immediately that cheating is an absolute deal-breaker. If so, that’s fine. Make that choice and move forward. But maybe he’s really apologetic and you aren’t sure what to do. It’s OK to feel confused and overwhelmed right now. The decision whether or not to stay with someone who cheats on you is your decision. Nobody else can tell you what to do. Take some time to think or to talk to a trusted friend or family member or to a counselor. There is no rush.

Do get tested for STDs.
If your boyfriend was sexually active with someone else, that increases your risk for a sexually transmitted disease (STD). Whether you choose to stay with him or not, it’s a good idea to get screened for any diseases.

Do forgive.
This doesn’t mean we’re saying stay in the relationship. Forgiveness doesn’t have to mean you give your boyfriend another chance. And it absolutely doesn’t mean you’re saying what he did is OK or glossing over it all. No, forgiving him isn’t about him at all. Forgiveness is about you. When you forgive him, you’re saying what he did was really wrong, but that you’re choosing to release feelings of bitterness and resentment. It doesn’t mean forgetting. It doesn’t mean reconciling the relationship. It just means you’re freeing yourself from the kind of anger that eats away at you.

Don’t jump into another relationship too soon.
Allow yourself time to grieve and time to heal. Enjoy your friendships and your own hobbies. Take care of yourself physically and emotionally. Though it might be tempting to jump right into another relationship to somehow prove to yourself that you weren’t the problem, that might not be what’s best for you emotionally. Give yourself time to heal from this experience so that you can enter the next relationship whole and healthy.

But do open yourself to trusting again.
When you’re ready, after you’ve given yourself time to heal, be open to the idea of another relationship – or, if you’ve chosen, to rebuilding the relationship with your boyfriend. The things you’ve learned from this experience can make you stronger and wiser, but they don’t have to make you completely skeptical about love. Not every guy will cheat on you. And just because you’ve had this bad experience doesn’t mean you’re doomed to bad relationships.

It might not feel like it now, but you’re going to get through this. And you will be stronger on the other side. You deserve to have a healthy relationship – where you’re valued and treated with respect.

If you’re boyfriend cheated on you and you need someone to talk to, our staff is here for you. And don’t forget, we can sure help you out with Gonorrhea and Chlamydia testing and treatment if needed. Just give us a call.

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How to Handle Holiday Gatherings When You Haven’t Shared Your Pregnancy News Yet

December 17, 2025

Holiday gatherings often bring familiar traditions, questions, and expectations. But when you’re carrying the news of an unexpected pregnancy that you haven’t shared, the season may feel different this year. You might be participating in celebrations while quietly navigating thoughts and emotions that others cannot see. If you want clarity about your pregnancy or a private space to consider your next steps, Collage offers free services, including pregnancy tests, ultrasounds, and confidential consultations, to support your needs. Schedule your appointment today. Prepare Yourself, Not the Perfect Conversation You may not be ready to share your news, and that’s okay. What can help is preparing yourself: deciding on the topics you’re comfortable discussing, the questions you want to avoid, and the boundaries you want to set. This proactivity allows you to answer without feeling like you need to tell all and not overshare. Create Space Throughout the Gathering Instead of thinking about the whole event at once, break it into smaller, manageable moments. Emotional regulation becomes easier when you give yourself space to reset. Try: Stepping outside for a few breaths of fresh air Finding a quiet room for a brief pause Taking a short walk after a meal Giving yourself permission to excuse yourself from overwhelming conversations These small steps can help protect your peace. Remember that if at any point during the gathering you’re ready to go home, go ahead. Take care of yourself by calling it a day when necessary. Meet Your Basic Needs Early pregnancy symptoms such as nausea and fatigue can be uncomfortable during gatherings. Come prepared to meet your own needs by bringing pregnancy nausea candy, snacks to settle your stomach, and a water bottle. Store these items in your purse, knowing they’re ready when you need them. You Don’t Have to Navigate This Season Alone If you want clarity before facing holiday conversations, Collage can help you understand your pregnancy and answer questions in a calm, confidential setting, which can make these boundaries easier to hold. Contact us whenever you’re ready to schedule a free appointment. Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services .

I Don’t Want Another Abortion

November 11, 2025

Learning you’re unexpectedly pregnant can bring up complicated emotions, uncertainty, fear, or even exhaustion if you’ve faced this situation before. You may know that you don’t want another abortion, but still wonder what options exist for your future. At Collage, we provide free and confidential support so you can explore your choices in a compassionate environment. Whether you want to understand what parenting or adoption could look like or simply need someone to listen, you’re not alone. Schedule a free appointment today to learn how we can help. Exploring Parenting Parenting can feel like an enormous responsibility, especially if your finances, relationships, or housing situation are uncertain. Many women ask themselves: “Can I really do this on my own?” “Where will I find the help I need?” “What kind of future can I provide for my child?” These are real and valid questions. At Collage, we’ll help you identify the resources and support available in your community. From offering a warm, supportive presence as you explore this option to providing referrals for resources like housing or childcare support, we’ll ensure you’re not facing these challenges alone. Parenting can be both demanding and deeply rewarding. With encouragement, community connections, and the right information, you can feel more confident in providing a stable, nurturing environment for your child. Understanding Adoption If parenting doesn’t feel like the right fit for your current situation, adoption offers another path forward, one rooted in hope and love. You remain in control of the process, deciding how involved you wish to be in your child’s life. You can select from multiple adoption plans depending on your comfort level: Open adoption: Allows for ongoing communication and contact between you, your child, and the adoptive family. Semi-open adoption: Offers limited contact through a third party, maintaining privacy while keeping some connection. Closed adoption: Protects complete confidentiality with no exchange of identifying information. Financial support is available throughout the adoption process. You’ll never pay for legal or medical services related to adoption. Best of all, adoption agencies can help ensure your needs are met and your wishes are respected every step of the way. Adoption is not an easy decision, but for some women, it brings a sense of peace and purpose, knowing their child is loved and cared for in a stable environment. We can discuss this option with you and offer referrals to reputable agencies so you feel informed. Taking the Next Step Your situation is unique, and so is your decision. Whether you’re considering parenting or adoption or simply need time to process your feelings, Collage is here to provide information and encouragement. We’re available to answer questions, explain your options, and connect you with trusted community resources, all at no cost and in a confidential setting. Schedule your free appointment today to start finding clarity and peace of mind. FAQ: Is it normal to feel uncertain about my decision? Yes. Many women experience mixed emotions when facing an unexpected pregnancy. It’s okay to take time and talk through your options before deciding. What if I don’t think I can afford to parent? We can connect you with programs and community partners that provide material and emotional support, so you will feel more equipped to parent if you choose to. How does adoption work? You remain in control. You’ll choose the family and the level of contact and receive guidance from trusted professionals who handle the legal and practical aspects of the process. Are services at Collage really free? Yes. All services are completely free and confidential. Your privacy and comfort are our priority. Collage does not provide or refer for abortions; however, we do offer pre-abortion screening through our no-cost services.

What Can Guys Do with an Unexpected Pregnancy?

By Kirsten Berns • October 28, 2025

Finding out your partner is unexpectedly pregnant can change everything in an instant. You may feel shocked, worried, or unsure about your role. Those feelings are normal. What matters most is how you respond in this moment and what steps you take next. At Collage, we provide no-cost and confidential services for women and men walking through unexpected pregnancies. Schedule an appointment to learn how we can support you—you don’t have to carry the weight of this situation alone. Understanding Your Own Feelings Before you can support your partner, it’s important to process what you’re experiencing. Talking with a trusted friend, family member, or mentor can help you sort through your emotions and understand what this news means. Showing your partner that you are engaging with your own feelings demonstrates that you are taking the pregnancy seriously. Walking With Her Your partner may be feeling the same uncertainty and fear that you are. One of the most powerful things you can do is simply be present. Attend appointments with her, listen when she shares her concerns, and offer support, like running errands or helping with everyday tasks. These small actions communicate that she is not facing this alone. Learning Together Getting informed is one of the best steps you can take together. At Collage, we provide option information so you and your partner can learn more about parenting, adoption, and abortion. Our staff will answer questions and help you understand what each option may look like. Having reliable, unbiased information allows you to approach this decision more confidently. Taking the Next Step This is not something you have to figure out overnight. Unexpected pregnancies can feel overwhelming, but there are resources, support, and people who care about both of you. Collage is here to listen, guide, and provide clarity when you need it most. Request your no-cost and confidential appointment today. Moving forward together can make all the difference. FAQ: What role should I play if my partner is pregnant? Listening, staying present, and supporting her as she makes decisions is crucial. You don’t have to have every answer, but being by her side matters. Can I attend appointments with her? Yes, and many women appreciate having their partner there. It shows support and can help both of you learn about options together. What if my partner chooses parenting and I don’t feel ready to be a dad? It’s normal to feel unprepared. Talking through your concerns with someone you trust and learning about options can help you move forward with more clarity. Does Collage provide abortions? Collage does not provide or refer for abortions. However, we do provide no-cost pre-abortion screenings, confidential services, accurate information, and compassionate support so you and your partner can make informed decisions.